Madison Asked – I Answered

I’m planning the bridal shower. The place it’s being held at can hold 50 people. The thing that’s irritating me is that she keeps adding all these people from FH’s side of the family that HAVE to be invited. Like an aunt’s sister or something, just because “that’s what you do.” I don’t even know these people! She’s saying that some of them might not come anyway, but they should be sent an invitation. Is that how it works?

And speaking of inviting people, I have a few questions on wedding guests.

  • What was your policy on +1’s for single guests?
  • Did you send invites to Great Uncle So-and-So’s Sister in Law, even though she most likely won’t come?

My guest list is getting out of control. We planned to invite 150 people or fewer (we need 125 minimum). I have a box of 100 invites (a score for $4 from the thrift store that was a lot better price than we had found elsewhere. Though I have to say these aren’t the chicest ones that we found. There are a lot of bridal shower invitations out there that have a lot trendier look.!). I don’t want to send out more than 100 invitations, but I’m afraid I might have to, with all these people I’m being told to add by both my parents and FH’s parents. I mean, I guess part of it is my fault, because I wanted this to be a big, fun party, and I did tell my parents to give me a list of some friends they wanted to invite, and it’s larger than I expected. I also don’t even know some of them. Also, FH’s mom is telling me to add this person and this person and this person, just to send them an invitation, even though they likely won’t come. WHAT IF THEY ALL COME ANYWAY?!

Hi Madison,

It sounds like you have done a lot to get things under control which is a big step forward in getting your bridal shower plans met. The worst thing that could happen is that you go even higher, trying to entertain more people. From the way it sounds you have already planned for a big bridal shower with 50 people. This is actually very big for a shower and it sounds like you haven’t got a lot of experience planning parties.

You mentioned that the guest list might double. And unless you are hosting a couples bridal shower I don’t see how that can happen. It isn’t common for a guest list to balloon that much and you already seem like you are looking for cheap alternatives.

That being said if you are already having problems with a guest list of 50 you will quickly run into trouble if you try to stretch the budget to cover twice as many people.

Unless the guests will be coming and going entertaining that many people in one sitting is enough to make even experienced hostesses cry. And Madison, I say this with all honesty I don’t want to think of you in tears.

Your best chance for success is if you get the bridal shower guest list back under control. You didn’t mention why it got like that but I can assume you have run afoul with some backseat planners telling you who needs to come. If you can’t handle it, tell them. They may try to guilt you, but you have it in your power to get things under control.

Best of luck!